NOTICE: THIS IS THE REVEAL OF THE MURDERER, IF YOU HAVE NOT READ PREVIOUS CHAPTERS, PLEASE GO BACK AND READ THEM.
ANOTHER NOTICE: IF YOU HAVE NOT MADE A GUESS AS TO THE KILLER IS ON THIS THREAD, THIS IS YOUR FINAL CHANCE.
TUBBYLAND MURDER MYSTERY - THE FINAL CHAPTER
(lazy, no little beginning parapgraph this time)
Pig: Whoa, whoa...you saw the killer?
- C.L. nervously nods
Cowhat: Actually...hold the spoilers...I think I know who did it. Milkdud, you said the killer disappeared in the middle of the chase, right?
Cowhat: And you met up with Michael in Quick Mart, am I right?
Cowhat: Well, before we came in I noticed a side door around the east side of the building, and over there is where Quick Mart is. Someone could have easily ran out and run over there in time to spy on you.
Mike: So they could have spied on PTLD and Michael?
- Cowhat looks at C.L., C.L. nods
Cowhat: Well...they didn't have to spy. They're in this very room. Pig, you're the one who solved all the puzzles, would you like to do the honors?
Pig: Certainly. The lesson to learn here is that not everything is as it seems...people can pretend to be stupid and get away with anything.
- Pig turns around
Pig: ...ladies and gentleman....the killer is Michael Winky!
- Everyone turns around
Milkdud: Whoa, whoa, you guys have got it all wrong! Right, Michael?
Milkdud: *backs away* M-M-Michael...?
Michael:...congratulations, you've got it all figured out.
Tupar:....well, might as well go ahead and tell us what this is about.
Michael: Heheh, fair enough. People everywhere treated me like crap, so I naturally expanded my knowledge by taking a bunch of classes in chemistry and neuroscience. Once that was done, I knew enough to make two concotions, a knowledge extraction solution and an electromagnetic wave absorption solution. I converted my extraction liquid into gas and pumped it into the atmosphere. It's a non-toxic solution that blends with the air. When inhaled, it "sticks" to the electromagnetic pulses of information that we know as thoughts, however it was engineered to detect pulses moving in problem-solving patterns, which would indicate knowledge. It's attracted to people with the most knowledge in the area, so all of the professors and such were affected by it. I drank the absorption solution (which tasted pretty good, believe or not) and was able to inhale the gas that contained the electromagnetic energy of knowledge. Those pulses were "unstickied' and absorbed by my brain. After some smaller stabilizing solutions and a good night's sleep, I became incredibly intelligent. Then I moved on to stage 2 of my plan. This was about luck. I met the right people, I found the right places, and soon I possessed glorious measures of cocaine. None of it was for personal use, that crap is freaking poison, but I sold it and made enough money to carry out stage 3, bribing politicians and making my way to controlling the city. Of course, that pesky PTLD caught on to me, so I had to take care of him...just like I have to take care of you.
- Michael draws a submachine gun and aims it at the group
Milkdud: H-hey man...w-what happened to you...y-you don't have to do this!
Michael: Ah, but I do, I have been pushed over the edge and this is what happened. Thank you, Milkdud. You've always been a good friend, but I'm afraid you know too much.
- Michael proceeds to back away, an officer with a crowbar runs down the stairs and hits Michael Winky on the head, knocking him out
Officer Cobalion: AAH WINKY
Tupar: Coblian? What are you doing here?
Cobalian: I came here looking for you guys and heard Michael Winky's voice and flipped and found a crowbar and attacked him because he IS fake, ok? VERY FAKE!
Mike: Technically, he's right. He was faking idiocy recently.
Pig: Indeed. Wait...what are these keys he has?
C.L.: The black one is to this cell. The silver one is to the trap door, that's what I wanted to tell you about. I've thought about the discrepancy and realized what it was.
- Pig lets C.L. out, C.L. grabs the silver key and heads to the trap door
C.L.: I realized that the body was made of wax, once I realized who was in here.
Tupar: Whoa, Clarence, what are you saying?
C.L.: I'm saying that we need to change the charges from murder...to kidnapping.
- C.L. opens the trap door, The Real PTLD climbs out
Cowhat: PTLD, you're alive!?!?!?
PTLD: Yeah...Michael said he saw me coming and had everything planned...before I could draw my gun he knocked me out. Then he placed a fake wax sculpture with the faucet in it's neck in the community center and locked me up in here. He said that if he was figured out he didn't want to get murder charges, so he did this instead.
Pig: Where did he even get a wax sculpture?
PTLD: He said he knew a few people...I don't know, it's better not to ask.
Tupar: Well, let's get him cuffed and booked.
- Mike squints and Pig and starts to pull out a ketchup packet*
Pig: Hey, we caught a kidnapper, you've earned it.
Mike: Yeeee! *slurps ketchup*
Thanks for all the support!
3 - 31 - 16 8:28 PM EDIT: Please disregard the teaser, I have sadly decided to cancel the sequel...for now.